Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Tea-Baggers Unite!: Acorn Conspiracy Edition

This will not stop being funny for a very, very long time.

So on the whole, no, I would very much encourage the geniuses behind this national Conservative Tea-Baggery to take to the streets as planned. Michelle Malkin, however, fears that The Left has set in motion a diabolical plot to insinuate certain of its members into the very thick of this public tea-bagging:

For the next 9 days, the left-wing blogosphere and left-wing clueless pundits will hammer away with their unreality-based Tea Party smears.

And on the ground, the tax-subsidized and Soros-subsidized troops are going to try and wreak havoc every way they can. Many readers and fellow bloggers have seen signs that ACORN may send in ringers and saboteurs to usurp the anti-tax, anti-reckless spending, anti-bailout message.

Damn that Soros fellow, anyhow! Why must he be constantly spending his vast ill-gotten fortune in a secretive and shadowy fashion in order to spread rumors and lies that there is some shadowy secretive conspiracy behind the actions of political opponents? He's always doing that. Fortunately Malkin is above such tactics, and duly provides proof of the Soros-ACORN sabotage-scheme, in the form of a link to a blog that links to a message board where a random commenter says that ACORN is up to no good. CASE CLOSED. I mean, obviously this is not just paranoid gibberish; the commenter certainly sounds like she's very calm, collected, and sensible:

Groups like ACORN and CODEPINK are nothing but Anti-American criminal organizations. BEWARE. I just stocked up on Pepper spray at JUST IN CASE

And, yes, that is a real link to an online Christmas Ornament shopping site, one that does indeed sell pepper spray, although, regrettably, this pepper spray is not holiday-themed.

The Onion doesn't hold a candle to half cocked wingnuttery with megaphone.

UPDATE: This is too good to be true. Alan Keyes has signed on to the DC Tea Party. Let the comedy commence.


  1. It just isn't Christmas without the fragrance of pepper spray in the air...

  2. The further they slip in power and relevance the more they slip in intelligent reasoning too. I agree it will be like a comedic circus to watch as conservatives without a real cause create their own in an orgy of epic fail and hilarity for a bored media to document.